So you moved in together and wonder what the point is in taking the next big step. Why should we even get married? You've said many times, "We know we are committed to each other, and we don't need the government to prove that." Well, yes and no.
There are many important reasons why you should get married (I mean there is a reason people have been doing it for hundreds of years).
Here are four reasons it's never too late to get married:
There is peace in knowing you are together forever. You know he's yours and you're his, and everyone else knows it.
The United Kingdom has "some of the highest levels of family instability in the Northern Hemisphere," according to one study, with a third of kids not living with both biological parents. The study reported children 12 and under born to cohabitating parents in the UK are 94 percent more likely to see their parents break up, compared to those whose parents married before giving birth.
When you make the commitment of marriage, you are less likely to leave or have your partner leave because you are both committed to working on the marriage and staying together "till death do you part." Knowing you both have made this commitment gives you a better peace of mind.
Although no one wants to think of this, death can happen. In case your sweetheart passes away, you want to be the one to take care of him and receive what you have built together.
I always think of the movie "While You Were Sleeping." In the movie Lucy is in love with Peter, even though they aren't dating. Peter gets mugged at a train station and falls into a coma. When Lucy arrives at the hospital to make sure Peter is OK, she is told that only family can visit him. She tells a nurse that she is his fiance so that she can be allowed to visit him in the hospital. Lucy is kept out of what she feels is an important part of Peter's life because she has "no relation" to him, even though in her heart their love is very deep.
This movie is a little old, so a hospital today probably won't shut you out of your loved one's room. However, there are legal aspects of their life that you can be shut out if you aren't married. I would never want to be shut out of any part of my sweetheart's life because of a piece of paper. Because yes, it is just a piece of paper, but it is legally binding.
This seems old school, but marriage creates an environment of stability for children.
According to the report, "In more than 60 countries, we see that the rise in cohabitation is linked to an increase in family instability for children," said IFS senior fellow and co-author W. Bradford Wilcox. "It suggests there's something about marriage as an institution that signals commitment."
"The instability gap doesn't depend on the level of cohabitation in a country," added Laurie DeRose, lead author and director of research for the World Family Map. "People suggest that those who cohabit become more like married couples, they become less distinct. But we showed in terms of outcome for kids, it doesn't happen. Cohabiting is still more unstable for kids, even in countries where it's more common."
Instability can cause children to turn to drugs, alcohol, sex and violence to release their feelings.
Many people don't want to get married because they are afraid of divorce. What better way to overcome this fear than by getting married? You and your sweetheart can prove to the world that you are going to be together forever.
If you have other concerns, write a pro/con list and discuss your fears with your significant other. This can be a great way for you to work on your relationship and deepen the level of commitment you have for each other.
Marriage can be hard, and we think we need the big production to get married, but it can be as simple as going to the courthouse together to sign paperwork.
Marriage will give you and your children peace of mind, stability and deeper love. Fawn Weaver, author of the Happy Wives Club, said "Happily ever after is not a fairy tale. It's a choice." Whether you have been dating for a year or living together for 22 years, make the choice to get married and continue your happily ever after.