THE BEARPOCALYPSE — I'm coming to you from the headquarters of the noble organization Freedom Fighters Against Bearmageddon, or FFAB. I'm reaching out today to show humans yet another video showing the bear spies and to also highlight one of our bravest soldiers.
This man was minding his own business in the epicenter of the Bearpocalypse, Alaska; Katmai National Park, Alaska, to be exact. As the man was walking on the trail he encountered a grizzly and her two cubs. The man was smart and immediately started filming.
But the bears don't want their vicious tactics caught on camera. It's bad PR, so the man made a smart move. He also narrated the whole thing for us.
To be honest, that's not really a bear avoidance maneuver, I think he's actually just applying for a job with the Discovery Channel. And he may get it because he stays calm in the face of absolute terror and manages to capture the whole ordeal on camera.
While I am the FFAB's biggest and most vocal supporter, I am a coward on the battlefield and likely would have fumbled trying to take my camera out and then wept like a hungry baby. I salute you, I-Walk-Backward-Like-a-Boss Man, you are a true hero.
Be careful out there, people, and make sure to have your cameras ready. Until next time, fellow human soldiers. Until next time.